Hello, I hope it’s ok to not post a picture, I’m quite a mess right now. I lack sleep, and I’m stressed, and just stopping panicking, lying down to write this and sleep.
I just brought home, on somewhat of a whim, the goodest and most communicative little boy cat from the street (he looks around or less than 6 months).
And I already have a lovely, cranky, scaredy cat of a 6 year old lady (sterilised).
I made the assumed mistake of letting them meet face to face as soon as I unlocked the door to the apartment.
Anya (old lady cat) froze, and left, scared, and went to her room with her litterbox, and has stayed there since.
The Boy, I left a bit around the apartment, to make sure he actually wants to stay instead of going back to the street (he loves it), took him outside and back once so he could emergency shit because he didn’t like the sand in the second litterbox I prepared (maybe too little, I’ll get more tomorrow), and now I’ve closed him in the WC, with a good-sized box with his new fluffy blanket, food and water for a day, and the insufficient but untouched litterbox. And he is very happy in his box, in the closed room.
But in between all that, were the incidents:
A couple of times, The Boy went into Anya’s room, found her, sat far away, curled his tail around his feets, and slow-blinked at her. She was not accepting. Deep-mewls, staying as far as possible (cornered), raised hairs on tail, tail circling around her side not touching her body, lowered ears, wide eyes.
He respected the distance.
I put him in the bathroom, closed the door, put her food outside the door to the bathroom. Left him to relax (he is, he is fine). Sat with her in her room for half an hour, so she would relax. She did a bit. Still hasn’t left her room, but came for pets after a while, in her room.
So. Given how unprepared I am for this, and how much I love both kittens, what tips do you have for me? What to be careful of?
The situation is not ideal. Is there any condition, where I should be prepared to send The Boy to be an outside cat, for the better of everyone?
I’m dying of sleepiness, ask anything, and any help is welcome. Thank you so much for even reading all this. Now I’m gonna sleep, and I’ll be back in the morning.
You did it wrong. Anya’s world is upside down with this intruder. “Just see what happens” is not healthy or safe. Accept that and move past it.
As another comment mentions, Jackson Galaxy has a good many videos on this topic, but the first priority should be the vet to check them out for a chip and health. Then watch the JG vids.
Remember: cat’s most important security is derived from familiar territory. Move even one piece of furniture and they need to reassess. A new un-neutered male is a direct threat to the territory and can cause many unwanted behaviors and stress on both cats.