This is the face of, “why are you at home during the week, and where the fuck are my treats homie.”
Whos a handsome boy! Yes he is!
The look of “you better be here tomorrow mfer, I don’t have opposable thumbs and those treats aren’t opening by themselves (I’ve tried)”.
She actually did try!!! I came home the other day and she’d grabbed the treat bag and had been gnawing at it to try to get to them.
Aw sweet Gibson, the beauty of her face and colours is awesome 💜💜
Oh my goodness 😂
The symmetry in her markings is something else 😻
You know, I didn’t notice till I saw this picture!
Aaaaand now 5 of us are sick because old mate came to work sick yesterday.
Fucks sake.
Pee in his coffee mug (don’t do that…)
Conversely…do it
Currently the scores are even 7s. Will or will not Simon siphon?
Shout out to the legend trying to intimidate me in his new Audi this morning. Bruh I’m in a shitbox hatchback missing more paint than I have emotional issues, you really think I’m scared of you hitting my car? Its 6am, windy AF and I’m doing the limit. The threat of you scratching your +100k car against my 7k (If that!) car aint the threat you think it is.
Hey now, you don’t how stressful his high powered and important life is. Do you know how expensive Audis are and how much bullshit one hast to put up with to afford one??
Next time, get out of his (yeah that’s right…HIS) lane and carry on with your lowly non-Audi-owning life.
Bro is game even driving it around my suburb. I mean its not fankston, but we’ve got more commodores with exhausts cut off than we do BMWs. Dunno whos worse, the teens fanging it or the soccer mums in huge SUVs they never quite mastered.
Similar mix to my hood. Done up cars drive by either young european dudes OR european dudes my age that haven’t grown up yet. SUVs driven by people who can’t drive. Mercs, BMWs and Porsche Cayannes all over…again aggressive and clueless.
The new breed seem to the Rovers. Seeing heaps of them around for some reason.
Must have been the same one riding my backside on the way home. Ugh.
Good Lord, this headache is so painful. Paracetamol doesn’t touch it, waiting for my partner to come back with some ibuprofen.
Stupid motherfucking teeth grinding. My whole head is throbbing 💀
you can get ibuprofen + paracetamol tablets now, and paracetamol + caffeine.
guessing the migraine havers are in power now lol
TW suicide
Paracetamol doesn’t really affect me, after I tried to off myself with it. I take one, if I have nothing else, but it’s mostly for the placebo affect and I tend to avoid it anyway.
Ibuprofen has helped though!
Fair enough, you should state what the trigger is for though, otherwise it’s no warning!
Ugh I’m so guilty of this too. I had a filling that hurt a little bit, and for some reason, whenever there’s any pain in my teeth, my immediate subconscious instinct is to bite down on the teeth that are hurting
Hugs and hope the ibuprofen helps, and your head feels better soon. I ran out of Nurofen, and swallowable paracetamol, so I’ve been using the aldi “hedanol” recently, which starts dissolving as soon as it touches the sweat and oils in my hand 😐
heat back can help. Can also hurt but if its throbbing maybe worth a try?
If you can get to a chemist, try something called “maxigesic”. Take 2, lay down and put your thumbs gently behind your neck
Two tennis balls in a sock actually hit the spots on the average neck juuust right
Just took Sammi for her ultrasound - poor love hadn’t been herself all yesterday to the point where I phoned the vet again - they suggested admitted her overnight but there wouldn’t have been anyone there so I decided to keep her home. Wise choice - the wind woke us both up at 3 and she was straight off with the snuggles and purrs and this morning she was demanding breakfast - unfortunately I couldn’t give her it since it’s a fasting procedure.
Now having a coffee and cake in Mentone while I wait for the school traffic to clear.Sending hugs.
arriving back in Melbourne today
That plane landing was a bit gross…
yeah, you don’t want any food or drink nearby
but you are safe and that is the main thing 🙂
yeah its good to be home!
🏡🥰
Old mate next door walking around in circles with a leaf blower.
Love it.
My neighbour is watering and swearing his head off cause the water is going everywhere but his lawn.
I should note, the lawns are still damp from the rainfall last night.
Ya wot mate?
A person with the surname ‘Hands’ logged a ticket today saying ‘Could you please assist me with [blahblahblah]’ and I feel like she missed the greatest opportunity.
as someone with a semi-interesting last night? I bet you hes 100% jack of it.
As someone who copped it through school, yep, I bet.
Roof is still on
I was convinced I was gonna walk out to find the pergola gone. It was built by an idiot before we brought the dump so its not exactly structurally sound.
I’m scared to look
flirt idea: are you melbourne’s winds? because you are blowing me away
Hey baby are you Melbourne’s winds? Because I want you to keep me up all night blowing and banging
This might work if there’s a high level of intoxication
Just remember to say ‘away’.
NSFW
Babe I appreciate your enthusiasm, but please stop blowing on my face!
🤭💨
I feel like that could go wrong so easily 😅
Outcome of the ultrasound with Sammi - no obvious tumours or obstruction. Enlarged lymph nodes in her stomach, so they want to proceed with the other ultrasound and take some samples. Meanwhile she’s home alert and hungry.
In other news there was a three vehicle stack in the middle of Main Street Mordialloc on the way home. Hopefully it’s cleared by now…so many hugs, hope she gets better soon
Got to my early morning grocery delivery before the birds this morning. It was out there for 15 minutes so they must have been busy
I got one of those mealy box things denigrated in the 12am-8am slot, once. It was 11:30 and still hadn’t been put on their truck, so I figured it was gonna be more of a 5/6am delivery and went to sleep. Then at 7 I woke up, and saw a text from 12:23 telling me it had been delivered 😟
Luckily the ice block kept out cool enough I wasn’t too worried, but I’m never making that mistake again!
The gel stuff they use in those deliveries stays cold for a really long time. They’re all enclosed as well so you’ll get no birds in there
Cat rambles
Melbcat got her antibiotics yesterday! Now I have to wrestle her (gently) to ensure she swallows the weird banana flavoured liquid instead of sneakily spitting it out. I am deeply unpopular for a few minutes afterwards (until it’s time to cuddle again).
If the infection reoccurs after this she may be referred to a specialist to check for underlying causes. I’m so glad I’ve maintained a bit of an emergency fund because if need be I will absolutely be getting a lift and going for it.
I’ve found an old smaller sketchbook + just a normal pencil sharpened in a standard way (both more portable) and am using it to scribble for art exercises. I’m also doing them as multiple tiny drawings on one page just so it doesn’t take forever to get the idea down, shade, draw precise lines or just finish. Also doing it while watching trashy video essays on youtube.
I really don’t have a lot of spare energy to create so trying to lose the perfectionism and just do easy structured doodles is probably the only way I could get anything done.
Well… it’s in. The assignment is in - but I feel so thoroughly muted about it because it turns out my supervisor had to go through what I’d written with a lot of red
inkpixels and rewrite a chunk of it. He wasn’t at all trying to put me down, if anything just help me so I’d get this across the line, but I feel like I have such a long, long, long way to go and I might have bitten off more than I can chew. I really feel quite low about how limited my brain capacity is compared to 5 years ago. Would love to have some kind of win this week to feel better about myself :(As counter-intuitive as it sounds having a supervisor being that interested in laying down a lot of red… is a win :)
I agree, it’s a win.
two things are worse than having someone help edit
someone who gives praise and does nothing when it really does need help
someone who puts down for no reason when the work is perfectly fine
but i get it, it’s a bit of an ego bruise
hugs
For sure, I have been very lucky to have a supportive mentor, I just feel like I’ve failed him (and myself) a bit - but better not to dwell on it, onward we go, even if the end result isn’t really ground breaking or entirely my idea, I’ll have learned something from it I hope.
so many hugs, sounds like you need a holiday
I really was hoping to go visit my aunt at the end of the month for a break + TLC but it seems like she might have other plans (lots going on in her life as well). I might head to my hidey hole in NSW if she isn’t available. I really would like to unplug for a bit
really long safety+organisation+life+mental health uodates
Today’s the 50th day since I returned and found all the damage and theft of my belongings. They’ve just about all been replaced now, there’s a couple of cables I’ve noticed missing, and one of the replacement things didn’t include a cable, but that’s about it.
They installed that gate thingy, but forgot to get the parts they need to make it actually work. It’s on un-detachable gears and pulleys, so it’s basically stuck open and doesn’t do anything. They measured all the door frames (most of them are cracked from where he fucked around with the locks), but apparently the tradie man forgot how to measure properly, so he came to redo it today.
ALLEGEDLY someone will be out to install new door frames and such tomorrow, but there’s probably no guarantees on that. They seem confused about if that’s actually happening or not. Apparently they’re installing proper security cameras tomorrow, and apparently on Friday the locksmith will come past to fix the shed lock.
AFAIK the deadbolt for the front door was knocked back, but it’s not that bad I suppose as the screen door essentially functions as an external deadbolt. I always lock that, so it’s fine. I’m worried that once that change the doors and door frames though, they’ll also change the locks to shitty ones that locksmith referred to as “night locks”. They’re easily opened by shimmering a butter knife down the side, or honestly even giving it a firm shoulder (it doesn’t even damages the lock, because it barely sits in there!). Don’t know what in house safety that’ll leave me, except to hope and prey they don’t move another drop kick in.
The program manager has been on “unplanned personal leave” for 2 or 3 weeks at this point. Not sure what’s happened, she was just here one day and then hasn’t come back since. The “case management practitioner supervisor” has been talking at me a lot. She gives kind of assistant manager vibes. Doesn’t have a whole lot of say in anything, so compensates by having little ego and power trips. The bloke above her, the regional manager, doesn’t seem that bad kind of, he’s so far maintained a professional demeanor with me, but he’s not too keen on doing very much and acts a lot more like a penny pinching CEO than anything else.
The org case manager took an “unplanned half day” on Monday, and no showed to a meeting we had scheduled. I, along with the 11 other people attending the meeting, just had to chill in the teams waiting room (which I super wish allowed cross-attendee conversations), and after about 15 minutes I ended up being the one to tell everyone the meeting had been cancelled and telling them they could leave. Even though I wasn’t running the damn thing.
On the DL, it seems that most of my care team and workers are all pretty pissed about the way things are running. Apparently they cancelled another meeting a week prior with 15 minutes notice.
I took to calling the “case management practitioner supervisor” (who seems to do more than supervise, and is temporarily program managing too), every single day about the security gate and other arrangements. I’m super pissed about it, it feels like they’ve kind of relegated my safety to concern number #45. There’s still no active protection keeping me safe, and I’m still here on my own. It also feels horrific that the other dude seems to get off on intimidation more than anything else, and nothing’s actually been done to stop that. The cops haven’t followed up about him tearing up the lawn, or the theft and damage, the gate is still non functional, the gate still doesn’t have a lock (besides my unapproved padlocks).
I still freak out and spiral into a panic everytime I hear a particularly loud motorcycle, and I check my cameras at every noise. I still have a constant fear that he’s somehow inside the house, and I still wake up at 2 or 3am in a sweat with a looming sense of terror that somebody is standing over me.
In the last couple of weeks, I seem to have a lot of repressed rage that sometimes bubbles up. I’m usually able to keep it repressed, but every couple of days, something minor seeming will happen and ploop I’m in a blind rage. That was the main reason for taking my Lemmy break, I don’t want to run the risk of that happening on some unsuspecting soul here. I’m seeing a psych weekly (her suggestion + child protection is paying the gap, and will pick up the rest of the costs for 6 months until I turn 18). It’s helping, but the primary focus has been on other things, with this as secondary.
Tafe has been a useful distraction. Being completely dumbfounded about how their LMS works, and how different it is from high school has been a useful distraction from everything else. Besides that, I’ve been trying to throw myself into my projects, but some of them just annoyed me too much so I temporarily gave up.
Dude I’m so sorry.
If it’s any consolation those absences probably mean shit is hitting the fan for a few staff behind the scenes over this fiasco, and the power trips are just her pettily taking that out on you. Classic HR behaviour. But it really doesn’t help the lasting effect you’re experiencing.
Btw the rage is incredibly normal in the circumstances and along with the rest may be a symptom of ptsd. I’m really hoping one day you can get well away from these incompetent chucklefucks because what you’re going through is so difficult.
I’m wondering if (for now) you can jam a chair under the door handle for extra reinforcement or warning, put metal pots that would topple making noise, and keep an uncapped can of oven cleaner spray handy?
At least then it would be a more specific sound heralding trouble so you might feel less jumpy at smaller noises, and you would have something to grab if you felt threatened. Whatever helps.
Edit: Even just a firm door wedge or a temporary lock might be some protection, delay, or help alert you.
You can even improvise with a fork which isn’t perfect but is something that can be done fairly quickly short term to give some early warning.
Ps. I hope this unsolicited advice isn’t stressing you out worse or making you angry. It’s a bad habit of mine. Just hoping there might be some comfort or something workable in there.
Thanks Melba. You’re probably right, at least I kind of hope someone’s copping it. But I doubt it. I think everyone’s gotten off mostly scott free, because the program manager, and area manager were on leave, and the “case management practitioner supervisor” had been sacked. And of course, nobody ever wants to rock the boat when in an interim role, so I think child protection exploited that as well, I’ve seen it happen before so it wouldn’t be unsurprising
There’s just 198 days until I turn 18, and then these people don’t really have a say in my life. However, I will likely still live here anywhere between an extra 6 months and year after I turn 18, although then I’ll have even less recourse in such situations
I can jam things in the door, but I’m not sure it’s really worth it. I already know that there’s nobody either in the house or my room, it’s just trying to teach my brain to comprehend that at 2:30 in the morning that’s an issue.
I don’t have oven cleaner, but always have something I know how to improvise with in case of self defence. I don’t keep a knife in my room anymore, because that does seem a little OTT and paranoid, but there’s always something. I also got a bright torch off Amazon (technically we’re meant to have one of those giant ones in the evacuation kit, but the last one was noticed to be completely corroded and smashed about 6 months ago, and they’ve yet to replace it). It has a strobing function, which might be useful, although I do wonder about the effectiveness of them.
If the new doors and frames do result in shitty locks, I’ll probably have to figure out how to install one myself. That’s probably a rather bad idea, so I’ll definitely have to see what happens next before I do anything like that, but it’s a possibility I have shoved away in the back of my mind if it’s ever as bad as it was again
Also probably worth noting: I have security cameras all over the property, and as of today, there’s now proper ones with a UPS as well. It is technically possible to get into the house by breaking into the neighbours backyard, then jumping the side fence, then shimmeying a window up, but it doesn’t seem super likely. So I’ll always have advanced notice if he returns
And no, absolutely not. I appreciate the advice and suggestions
These organisations are all about saving face but I suspect at least some manure is flying behind the scenes.
And yeah, I totally get it.
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So many hugs.
Thanks SG. I just want to say that I really appreciate how much of a rock you and the rest of the DT regs have been through the entire ordeal. It helps to have somewhere to vent that isn’t biased towards the org
more hugs
More thanks
God, that whole situation sounds awful. You’re doing the right thing by pushing and calling everyday to follow up on things.
Learning that LMS will keep you busy. They’re done of the worst programs ever made. At least you have something to take your mind off things
Thanks tom. I’ve honestly been beginning to wonder if I’m putting unfair expectations up, mostly due to the absolute apatheticness most people involved irl seem to show. I did get some hopefully good news about an hour after I posted that. The “case management practitioner supervisor” sent me a text to say that “a number of builders will be there replacing the door frames and people for the cctv stuff”. I’m a little worried about their implementation, as before the doors may make the situation worse if they don’t reuse the same locks, and the cctv system might end up being installed in some office somewhere monitored by randos. AFAIK it won’t be on premises. It’ll be proper corporate type surveillance, so remote monitoring (by the people living here anyways) won’t be a thing. But if it’s like the ones they put in resis, it also has extremely good night sight
And yes, I’ve never used something that looks so modern, yet acts like it hasn’t been redesigned since 4kbps was the average internet speed! I had a zoom call earlier with a “success coach” from the TAFE who walked me through how to use it and what to do. Seems I can safely ignore most of the buttons, which is nice. But there’s still a bit to figure out
Not unfair expectations at all.
They royally fucked up and failed to protect you. And they’re still failing to protect you.
