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Joined 10 months ago
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Cake day: December 16th, 2023

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  • It’s amazing how the smallest routine deviations can change things.

    I once put my 1 year old in the car seat before loading the rest of the stuff into the car. My kid has always hated being constrained, so I didn’t bother buckling the seat belt, as I figured there’d be more joy in being able to reach and play with toys while I loaded the car.

    All went well, we got underway, and upon arriving at our destination I realized I never actually did up the safety restraints.

    Holy shit

    I thought

    If I’d gotten in an accident in the last 30m of driving, my kid probably would have died

    What a shock and brutal realization to have.

    Many people have complemented me on my parenting, complemented me on my nurturing and caring attitude towards my kid and other children too. I’d like to think I’m a good father…but the momentary lapse I had could have ended a life and ruined so many more.

    Yes, it can happen to anyone. I feel nothing but sympathy for the parents who have lost a child this way.

    While not every parent who loses a child this way is a good person, people like Lyn Balfour have demonstrated that many of the parents responsible for these cases are good people who simply had a momentary lapse in attention that resulted in the worse mistake of their entire life.

    I think that it is not for the public to judge them, and it’s not appropriate to publically shame parents who have been through a tragedy like this.

    Those parents will be forever haunted by the waxy face of their dead child, will see other children playing in parks, and remember what their child looked like the last time they saw their remains, will remember how beautiful and vibrant their baby was - and know that it’s their fault that the child is forever gone.

    I think that’s punishment enough.











  • My job is within 10mi of my home. If I walk there, I get there in 2 hours. If I take public transportation, it takes me 1h45m to 2h20m depending on the day.

    I also live in a community where our electricity is from 90% renewable resources, 10% nuclear. Switching to an electric car is a 100% reduction in carbon usage for my commute. Using the bus isn’t.