I don’t know. Sports conventions are not science. When I see the history of things being banned or allowed, it doesn’t always make sense. Then we have stuff like weight categories. Anyway, that’s beside the scope of this particular discussion.

Beyond XX and XY: The Extraordinary Complexity of Sex Determination

Try this. Biological sex is more complex than what is usually taught in high school. And that’s only humans. There’s this system for instance: Temperature-dependent sex determination

I thought the same. Now plataforms have a target audience to focus. The accounts move, the artists have to follow, the rest has a reason to move as well.

I agree there’s abuse, but there are laws:

Article explaining the laws used as support / Article with historical precedent.

Both in Portuguese.

That’s on me, I’m sorry. I realized the implications of my words, but failed to choose better ones. I have no problem with your style or tone. As I said, I feel your posts are personal and passionate.

Let’s try again. Context is important. I believe a lot in subjectivity, which can be confusing, others need facts and concrete examples, something I have learned to keep in mind when asked in the past. You tell me the best way to communicate with you.

You said I attacked you and that I want to fix your existence. Those are not facts. I offended you and I might have hurt you, these are facts and I won’t deny them, and I accept my responsibility for what I did.

You see, I suffer from anxiety and depression. After two months in therapy, I feel comfortable to once again engage in the community and take risks. I just wanted to help (which doesn’t excuse my mistakes), but reading this response would make me retreat again weeks ago. I would ask myself of I’m really this bad person you are interpreting me to be and if my contributions have any value, if I shouldn’t just let other people more prepared to deal with it. I was also hurt by what you said.

I’m a sensitive man, but my whole life people have called me robotic, unfeeling, reserved and the like. They didn’t agree with the way I lived my life and thought trying to change me was a kindness. They are wrong. I’ve seen so many people suffer because the world refuses to allow them space that I try to make sure I’m accommodating. I believe everyone should grow in life by learning how to express themselves in their own unique ways.

All this is me trying to reveal myself so I can be better understood. Because I think it’s important. Because I think this community is important. And because I think you are important too. I learned a little bit about you today. I have learned other bits before and imagine I’ll see more in the future. I asked some questions to help me with that as well, but you decide what you want to share.

Please, don’t feel like we are piling on you. I personally would say you came as a positive disruption, but making sure this is a safe space is a big priority and that means even discussions filled with good intentions have to be careful. You should check tildes for comparison.

Now about forums and chat rooms. Chat rooms never felt really personal to me, but I could never socialize with a lot of people at the same time well. Forums, 20 years ago, were a space I inhabited frequently. Deeper context for me was knowing who I was talking to because I had read their posts and comments in the past. We engaged ideas, but we considered people as well. Of course, not every discussion was the same, with some more abstract than others.

I have been seeing your posts for the past week. They feel very personal, but your approach feels detached, academic. Try being more conversational, asking questions and being interested. For instance: What brought you here? Why do you post? What do you expect to offer and get? Ideas, opinions, experiences? Educate people, get collaboration for your ideas, someone to challenge and strength them?

I truly believe our mods want to be accepting, but their role is also to maintain peace by guiding and reminding we all of our philosophy.

I’m not sure of I understand it correctly. Would pronouns in this case carry the same value as titles do, or terms of endearment? Maybe a mix of both. Titles have the explicit aspect, but terms of endearment inform the kind of relation we have in an informal situation.

The practical use still escapes my imagination. Would you talk more about that?

I understand the sentiment and the urge to clap back at these kind of non comments, but remember to be(e) nice. Specially to yourself. It’s not worth it to spend time and energy dealing with a troll comment.

I was talking about how we always have this type of discussion frequently with my therapist earlier today. It’s always nice to pause and remind ourselves and those outside of our philosophy. One thing that I’d like to add is we might not be(e) nice sometimes because of personal circumstances. We are having a bad day and a comment will trigger a reaction that would be uncommon or we might be aggressive without provocation.

In cases we feel the need to hit back, I’d advise postponing the response by at least one hour. Give yourself time to clear your mind and think things over. And if you are the target of users having a bad day, reminding them that they are not be(e)ing nice is the alternative. Asking questions is the best. “Did I offend you?”, “Did I say something wrong?”, “I don’t understand what the issue is.” Even if they keep the aggression, they will point to the specific issue that needs to be worked on, or prove they don’t want to discuss genuinely.

I read it. I was familiar with that form of activism, but I don’t agree this is it. I saw all the examples presented as forms of reframing the situations to deflate their original meaning. The author says using weird is non violent, but it’s an attack using a word. The advice is use it because it hurts, not because it makes their ideals less appealing.

I sometimes say to my best friend, among other generally inappropriate things, that something she does is gay, and she does the same to me. It is a private reclamation of the use of the word gay as a slur, but outside any context, to an outside observer, it’s just casual homophobia.

Let me go back to that child. I don’t think they will hear horrible people being called weird and see it as being bad weird. It’s just plain weird. If it’s not being different that’s the issue, but the specific bad behavior, why the focus is on weird? We know words help shape our perception, we fight for those changes. What bothers me is hearing the same harmful words I heard so many times towards me and around me being used by those who seemed to understand how they hurt. I guess it’s similar to the discussion of being okay to attack someone’s looks if they are on the other side.

Does it really work like that? I would say that they are not trying to fool any test, just getting harder to be detected. The goal being looking completely realistic.

I’ll be using the information in this site: https://www.verywellhealth.com/coping-mechanisms-5272135

Adaptive coping mechanisms empower you to change a stressful situation or adjust your emotional response to stress.

The point of my post was to say there is a difference between fantasy and plans, and not to judge or act as if fantasies will ever be more than that.

The problem here is fear, not hate. The person that harmed them lives in the same neighborhood and running into them while on the street is a great concern, but my friend could go out in part because of this fantasy. It’s small, stupid and generic. Unhealthy is writing useless in your arm using nail clippers or trying to cut your own wrists.

Thanks for trying to clarify my view, but, for your peace of mind, just try to ignore aggressive comments like this.

Isn’t that a matter of behavior? The crack is doing something expected from a crack and the system warns you because most wouldn’t use it without being aware. If you really trust the file, add it as an exception.

Or do you want a software that can vet good cracks from bad cracks?

I saw the same post and started writing something that went in a different direction, but that seems complementary. Basically, you don’t have to respond.

I do believe you’re responsible for what you write, but you’re under no obligation to answer any and every kind of criticism that is thrown at you. You might have to read something that’s hard or hurtful in the comments, which is fine if they are trying to follow the recommendations listed above, it’s a process, but you don’t have to accept an attack to your personhood or an attack to what you wrote without any explanation.

I understand the desire to make clarifications and being clearly comprehended, or defending oneself from attacks, but a direct response might be counterproductive. Say nothing, or go back and put amends to the original thoughts with an edit.

Also, and this is for all the parts involved, the discussion is not going anywhere. It will not get drown out in a sea of comments, you can take your time and come back later. More importantly, you’ll likely see the same people around again. Take care of your community. Defend, understand, educate, be nice.

You say suicidal thoughts, which I believe you have, but you showed us your depressive thoughts. Some times, it’s not intellectual, it’s just one aspect of your biology you can’t will away. You might need medicine, you’ll definitely need to work on it without knowing if your efforts will get results.

I saw in another comment you talking about the things you love. Choose one and really set aside some time to enjoy it. Create a period of total selfishness. Do something practical.

Intellectually, to quiet the voices that are so negative and justify bad decisions, I suggest you question them, specially when they are absolute. For example, “there’s no time to dedicate to what I love”. Really? No time, zero? Is that the absolute truth? Try to be more truthful. Maybe the time you have is not enough (but again, really?), which doesn’t mean zero time generally. Just being honest about your situation can help change perspectives and stop you believing the lies you tell yourself.

Do you enjoy watching videos? There are some professionals I regularly watch that usually help me see the directions I could go to improve myself. To tell the truth, I’m in a low right now and not being treated, but I wish I were.

I would suggest something like a “good news week”. The last week of every month dedicated to sharing the good content we have stumbled upon or experienced. Something to practice a new behavior and make it stick. I don’t believe the changes will come organically. Or maybe a weekly challenge thread, with some goals to the ones that participate. Share a good memory, uplifting news, something that made you smile…

The obvious solution on X’s side is to ID everyone that wants to post anything. And remember that the obvious solution doesn’t have to be the best solution, a good solution or, even, a real solution at all.

Sorry to ruin your comment, even though I mean it, but they are only talking about the birds in the nests, not most birds that go with the flow like sheep.