I have been propositioned by swingers quite a bit. It’s to the point that if a couple is nice to me, I start getting suspicious. This has happened with acquaintances, long-time friends, people I’ve met at a party, co-workers, and even strangers at the beach. Three times that I can remember off the top of my head, they propositioned me and my girlfriend at the time (separate girls many years apart). Is this a normal thing? What about me could make me attractive to swinger couples?

I’m a cis-gendered straight male. As far as physical attractiveness, I would say I’m slightly above average based on what women have told me and how they treat me.

  • AFK BRB Chocolate@lemmy.worldEnglish
    3·
    4 months ago

    When I was late teens and early twenties, I kept getting propositioned by gay guys. It started to bother me - I’ve never been in any way homophobic, but I’ve also never been attracted to men - and I started to worry that there was some vibe I gave off that made people think I was gay.

    Then I mentioned it to a gay guy who I knew, and he said that the vibe I give off is of someone who isn’t judgemental and who wouldn’t react badly to being asked. Maybe there’s something similar or analogous to your situation.

    Edit: propositioned, not preposition

    • kambusha@sh.itjust.works
      0·
      4 months ago

      An upside-down pineapple specifically signals that someone is a swinger or is looking for swinger parties. This association likely stems from the fruit’s historical connotations of wealth and welcome, evolving into a discreet way for swingers to identify each other in public or at events. Displaying a pineapple, especially upside down, can indicate an invitation to join in on swinging activities or parties

      TIL

  • KuroiKaze@lemmy.world
    0·
    4 months ago

    This happens to me a lot and the reason I think it does is because I’m good looking enough that the woman could potentially get herself in the mindset that I’m attractive but not so good looking or masculine that I intimidate her existing boyfriend. I’m in that sweet spot of approachable non-judgmental, in decent shape, good attitude, kinky predilections, and I can make people laugh.

    I have been approached double digits number of times which led me down the same thought path as you.

    • I'm back on my BS 🤪@lemmy.autism.placeOPEnglish
      0·
      4 months ago

      I have been approached double digits number of times which led me down the same thought path as you.

      Yess, right‽ It’s odd. I was like, “What is going on??” I think you might be on the ball. I’m attractive enough for the woman, but not too attractive to intimidate the man. Also, thinking about what people have said, I now remember that I asked a gay guy that was into kink about it. He said that my initial presentation is that I look non-judgmental and down for whatever. Basically, I seem like someone that could possibly be interested in it, but would be chill about it if I wasn’t.