I had an older relative that watched The 700 Club like it was the news. This honestly is just mid-level crazy for them. Rest in piss Pat Robertson, you absolute fuckhead.
Yay, verily.
This is false advertising. My finds have never come with the demon.
This is the McDonald’s Monopoly debacle all over again.
Fun fact you can permanently scare off Jehovah’s witnesses by offering them a random object and insisting that it’s absolutely not cursed or possessed. Really insist that the thing you pulled out of the junk drawer is absolutely not possessed and is simply a gift that they need to accept.
You will never see them again.
Is this an unethical LPT?
Arguably, yes.
Listen I know they’re annoying, but the people standing at your door aren’t the problem. It’s the cult they’re in.
Telling them there’s a demon in your house is likely to cause them a decent amount of psychological distress. They literally believe in demons, they literally believe those demons want to get in to their home, and they literally believe it will destroy their life, get them kicked out of the cult, and separated from their only support network. Even though you and I know none of those things are true, (well, being disfellowshipped is a real thing) they believe they are and it’s going to fuck with their head.
That said, they won’t stop unless you scare them away, and that’s probably the most harmless way to do it.
I bring them in, offer them tea and tell them what I think of the bullshit. After a few trips they come in for tea and we talk nicely about other things.
unethicalYou misspelled ethical.
You can also make them never come back by saying ‘convert the car’ then hitting the keyfob and saying ‘see it even talks back’.
My finds have never come with the demon.
Not with that attitude.
I always have to summon my own, and candles and goats blood have been hit hard by inflation in Biden’s America
They used to, but since thrifting came into style, they mark up the possessed stuff to the point where you might as well go buy brand new possessed stuff.
Hopefully they’ll get along with my current demons
It’s nice to take care of your inner demons and give them a friend
The more demons, the better!
As long as you don’t mind being the “crazy demon lady”
“Ill just put this over here with the rest of the demons…”
You can trust him since he looks like a possessed thrift store doll of Dorian Gray whose painting has just lost its magic and time is still deciding which parts of him to fuck up first.
more frens to play mariokart with (on my thrift store wii)
Rest in Piss bozo
I love pride
I never found a demon-haunted doo dad at a thrift store, but one time I found this ornate gold and black cat statue about four feet tall, very Egyptian looking and they wanted $4 for it, so I bought it. I’m into that kind of garish stuff. Anyway the guy at the register actually said, “what if it turned out to be an enchanted statue, and once you got it home, it turned into a beautiful man.”
And I was like…!! cheapest date ever.
Luckily, the kids in Bangladesh don’t believe in Demons, thats why buying new is so important!
Is this a WARNING?
or a PROMOTION!
My wife used to live with some people who refused to let us bring her dresser into the house until they got some dried sage to burn around it.
Still not sure what that supposedly did, but the magic plant smoke apparently drove out the ghosts.
the magic plant smoke apparently drove out the ghosts.
Doesn’t sound unreasonable to me
I read a book that had a similar premise. Fucked if I can remember the author and title.
Oh, is it “Needful Things” by Stephen King?
No, I know it wasn’t him. It was a comedy, it might have been Christopher Moore, but I no longer have the book.
I think Rick can fix that for us
Jokes on you, I’m into that.