Just about every time J.D. Vance — the most unpopular vice presidential nominee in American history — opens his mouth, he ignites a firestorm of criticism and likely shaves another point off the Republican presidential ticket’s polling numbers.
On Sunday, in an interview with CNN’s Dana Bash, Vance admitted that he and Donald Trump made up a baseless and racist story about Haitian immigrants eating pets in Springfield, Ohio.
“If I have to create stories so that the American media actually has to pay attention to the suffering of American people, then that’s what I’m going to do,” said Vance, a U.S. Senator representing Ohio.
Ironically, Vance’s attempt to point out imagined “suffering” has led to actual suffering by his own constituents.
If they both made it up, why aren’t there calls for both to resign?
You can’t resign from a job you don’t have!
He can resign from society like Howard Hughes. I wish he would.
And then write Harry Potter style books about himself!
- President Trump and Roger Stone
- President Trump and the Chamberpot of Secret Documents
- President Trump and the Prisoner of Financial Scams
- President Trump and Everyone’s Fired
- President Trump and the Order of the Hamberder
- President Trump and the Half-Baked Concept of a Plan
- President Trump and the Deathly Hollow Promise
I commend your commitment to the gag!
Thanks! Now that I’ve got a fan base to disappoint, it’s time say something disturbingly sexist or transphobic.
Girls have a button and boys have a pole. Wicked touching takes its toll.
This is ridiculous. How do you not already have Holywood breaking down your doors for film rights Σ(ﾟ∀ﾟﾉ)ﾉ
Or just save his toenail clippings in jars like Hughes. Whatever. Just go into Mar-a-Lago and never come out of his room again.
I thought he saved his urine in jars
Then again, I guess you can save multiple things in jars
for that he would need to have some kind of a honor code :/
Maybe we can reinstitute societal shunning?
We tried to.
Called it cancelling.
Well they technically didn’t make it up. They are repeating the words from a Neo-Nazi group called Blood Tribe who were marching through Springfield with Swastika flags.
Could actually be worse than just making it up.
Instead of being a dumbass that’s a bit racist, he’s a mouthpiece for Nazi propaganda. That’s a whole lot worse than making it up.
And entirely on brand
I’ve seen this repeated a few times and I don’t think it really holds up. Drake Berentz (who gives his name as Nate Haggers because racists think that’s funny) did not really mention anything about eating pets. The guy is a piece of shit and maybe they helped spread the initial post but that piece of shit’s words at the council meeting are not the source. It really just seems to stem from the casually racist Karen on social media who is sad now that everything has blown up.
Although if Berentz (who is a carnie) is the one who made the fake 911 call back in late August about Haitians eating geese in the park, I am clearly wrong.
I was reading about those Blood Tribe assholes, they are a Nazi gang that moved into the area about a year ago specifically to stir up hatred in the community.
Because only one of them is actively serving as a US Senator for Ohio, the state in which the supposed migrant pet eating crisis is taking place. The other doesn’t have a job to resign from.
Ohhhhh, that makes sense. It would probably help if I read the article, but I hate giving these people clicks. I thought the headline was talking about resigning from running for VP.
A conservative king can lie as he pleases it would seem, but apparently their VPs are expendable.
We already learned that in the aftermath of Jan 6th.
My question is why do these people continue lining up to serve said “king”?
Maybe that’s why they ended up with Vance as the pick? A relative newcomer who’d risk getting sacrificed to become a more hosehold name? I can certainly imagine others looking on at the at end of Pence’s tenure and choosing to avoid the position.
If anything, I’d imagine they picked Vance because he was willing and eager to do whatever it takes to win.
There were a number of other choices lined up too: https://nymag.com/intelligencer/article/trump-vp-pick-2024-candidates-odds.html
Republican VP candidates are raping Ohio’s children.
Oh that’s made up? Doesn’t matter because it brings attention to a very important issue.
Republican politicians and voters are conspiring to harm innocent people by making up false rumours about them being dangerous, inciting violence against them.
“Oh, okay, but I don’t care. As long as the right people are hurt!”
This is a large part of why I don’t feel emotionally connect to the concept of being a member of humanity.
This is a large part of why I don’t feel emotionally connect to the concept of being a member of humanity.
You are, they aren’t.
I’ll bet he also made up the story about not fucking a couch.
Some stories just sound more believable than others.
He thinks it’s okay to make up harmful stories because the late night comedians won’t leave the couch thing alone. What a maroon.
Maybe they’d leave it alone if he left the couches alone.
I wonder if this is just damage control for Trump? JD is pure slime, but I wouldn’t be surprised if he is just being thrown under the bus on this one, since it seems to be sticking as the dumbest part of the debate.
Vance posted the lie days before Trump lost his damn mind in the debate.
It might have been both of them, but Vance was way out front of it.
Nah let him cook (himself). If they swap him for someone else things might actually go better for Trump.
Resign from the senate.
Rather than just going back to that job after the campaign.
This campaign is literally zero cost for him as it stands. He’s a senator and will continue being a senator if he loses.
He should be forced to resign for things he’s done and admitted doing publicly.
Fair point
Resigning requires feeling shame for your actions. Vance has absolutely no shame.
Keep in mind that his private communications have leaked. He talked about what a monster Trump is for making immigrants feel unwelcome and unsafe.
Vance is not like Trump. Trump was raised to be a monster and not intelligent enough to question anything. Vance, OTOH, is smart enough to know better. He chose to be this person. He willingly, voluntarily sold his soul to the MAGA devil. That’s why looking at him and listening to him makes people’s skin crawl. There was a person in there once who was forcibly evicted in favor of a monster.
This is exactly why he gives me the heebie jeebies. That fuck would sell out his own mother for a Klondike bar.
Keep in mind that his private communications have leaked. He talked about what a monster Trump is for making immigrants feel unwelcome and unsafe.
Source for this?
Thank you!
It was a public tweet, it’s all over the news…
https://pbs.twimg.com/media/E5Oc4vfWUAAH9vn?format=jpg&name=large
Thank you!
Kind of want this limp dick idiot to stick around. The more damage he does the funnier and better it is for all of the sane(ish) people in our country.
When confronted with his assertion that he created a story, Vance — after a long pause of on-air silence — backpedaled, saying he “created the American media focusing on it,” and continued to insist that the story came from “first-hand accounts,” which has been proven false.
Where is this video? I really want to see his facial expression during this long pause
God this article is annoying to read.
What did Vance actually say ?
Did he say something analogous to “I admit that I created the pet-eating story about immigrants” ? Who knows?
“If I have to create stories so that the American media actually has to pay attention to the suffering of American people, then that’s what I’m going to do”
i haven’t seen the full interview but that’s probably all there is to it
I’m not saying it’s as annoying to read as some ‘dance around the issue’ ‘articles’ from ‘the other side’, but the need to inject a truckload of related bagage into every sentence just devalues the entire effort.
Like, yes Kevin, we know this is bad. We know it doesn’t spark joy in the hearts of Haitian children. But just act like you’re half a journalist and give us a clear cut of the cold dry facts. Wrap up your emotional shit in a closing paragraph if it helps you convince yourself
Who would he even be replaced with?
Rudy Giuliani
Honestly, I wonder if Trump just wants to pick people who are not to famous so he can keep all the attention on himself.
I hear the headless body of Spiro Agnew is on the shortlist.
Who would he even be replaced with?
Whoever sucks up to Trump enough on the day.
Laura Loomer it is, then. Up to, off, same.
Sucks up, sucks off… is there a difference?
The skeleton of abraham lincoln.
That would take over the news cycle nicely.
Didn’t he write a book about his life growing up, and the suffering of the American people near him? And then leverage that into a political career?
Wonder how much bullshit was in there, too. (If you haven’t, the answer is “pretty much most of it”.)
Not near him. In Appalachia, where he did not grow up.
He also used a ton of insulting stereotypes about Appalachians.
I read it as soon as it came out, even before it had become just a huge book, because I was raised really close to where his grandparents are from. And as soon as I read it, my antenna’s going up all over the place, because we’re not even three or four pages in and he’s already generalizing. For instance, there’s a scene where he talks about his uncles, who are these drunks who fight everybody and they beat their wives, and then he calls them the embodiment of the Appalachian man. Well, as an Appalachian man, that’s deeply troubling to me, because that doesn’t embody Appalachian masculinity as I know it. It does embody the stereotypes of Appalachian masculinity over the last 150 years of media. And that’s sort of what I mean. It just sort of presses the buttons that are already there and made people feel really satisfied, in that it’s sort of like, “Oh, well, I knew this all along, and now somebody is solidifying it for me.”
https://www.politico.com/news/magazine/2022/05/06/jd-vance-book-dangerous-00030374
(That’s from an academic who studies Appalachian culture, incidentally)
Interesting read, thanks.
I’ve grown cynical and assume any hard luck life “memoir” is bullshit and propaganda for whatever political slant the author wants to use other people (or at least the socially accepted stereotype of) to try to justify so I skipped reading it.
Sounds like I didn’t miss much.
Pretty much nail on the head here. Its basically “something something bootstraps: the novelization”
Expect the couch but, I believe that 100%.
I didn’t know Vance until he was picked as running mate. My list of people with punchable face keeps getting longer.
Why are we giving Trump an excuse to drop his failure of a running mate?
I thought the calls were for Vance to resign from the the Ohio Senator position.
Right? I say let them keep the anchor offboard the sinking ship. Vance has been an embarrassment from the beginning and it’s funny to see them take his Ls.
What a day…
